Return To The Playground: The Stalled Recovery of Union Beach

This article was originally published elsewhere locally – I share it with you all here on my blog:

I had a rather difficult week on a number of fronts last week, so I set out for Union Beach last Friday because it always helps me to gain perspective. When I have problems, and some of them are significant, going to Union Beach and seeing the remains of homes still damaged from Hurricane Sandy helps to reorder my outlook. It serves as a reminder that if things seem bad, they can always be a lot worse.

 

I drove down Florence Avenue past many homes that had been repaired and restored and past businesses that unfortunately have not. I turned onto Front Street where many empty lots and active or inactive construction sites are scattered along the waterfront. I parked the car and got out to look at the New York City skyline which was slightly obstructed by haze on this hot summer afternoon. I walked out to the end of a short pier next to the beachfront area and the breeze picked up which felt like such a welcome change from the humid air I just drove through further inland.

 

I looked down briefly at my buzzing smartphone to check an email related to some of the disappointing news I had received earlier that morning. I did not notice that a man had joined me at the end of the pier until his deep baritone voice bellowed, “Excuse me, sir, could you tell me where that amusement park down there is called?” He was pointing toward the Waterfront Park in neighboring Keansburg which is visible in the distance to our right, directly east of our location. “Yes sir that is the Keansburg Waterfront Park. It has water rides, amusement park rides and a boardwalk area with games and food as well as stuff for the kids. You should check it out sometime” I replied.

 

The man smiled back at me, “Yes I plan to come down with my kids, I am on a break from work right now. I drive a delivery truck” he told me while rotating his head around as if on a swivel, trying to take in as much as he could of the scenery around us on this beautiful summer day. I noticed the golf type shirt with the logo of his company on it earlier and assumed he was a route delivery driver. “My wife’s cousin does that same job, it is not easy” I said as the wind blew sand on the people on the beach next to us. “Yeah it can be tough at times, but when I get route stops on the Shore I try and take 10 minutes or so and catch a break, especially on days like this” he said as he fixed his baseball cap. “Oh yeah absolutely you have to do that. I think we are all entitled to a break, that is what I am doing out here too” I explained.

 

The man pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and said “I have to head all the way up to Warren after this to make a delivery stop” I asked: “How far away is that from here like 45 minutes” He smiled shook his head and said “Yes sir exactly right 45 minutes on the nose” He motioned to his phone and said, “Pretty soon they are going to be calling me wondering where I am, so I better go. It was very nice talking with you sir” I smiled shook his hand and said “Yes it was nice to chat with you, safe driving” and with that he went off down the pier to head north to Warren.

 

I reflected on the many jobs and occupations that people have and the skills that it takes to be successful at them. I thought about some of my friends and how they have expressed that they would not be able to be a writer like I am and put together all types of articles and creative work. I guess we are all called for different functions and to use our gifts and talents to achieve different objectives.

 

I walked back toward the street and talked to a lady who was walking a dog, she smiled and asked how I was doing. She told me, “You should head toward the park it is shadier there, this Sun can get hot”. I told her that I was heading that way and to enjoy the rest of her day. I proceeded to head to the park, one of my usual stops in Union Beach.

Jack’s Playground

 

The Fireman’s Park area in Union Beach features a playground named in memory of Jack Pinto, one of the victims of the Sandy Hook school shootings in Newtown, Connecticut. I covered the dedication of the playground back over two years ago, and I have written several stories about the recovery of the Shore from Hurricane Sandy that feature the playground.

 

I stop at the playground nearly every time I come into Union Beach whether it is for a story or just for some leisure time. I went that day under sunny beautiful skies and first stopped at the area where Jack Pinto’s handprint is on a plaque. I noticed immediately that two teddy bears and some flowers were left there with a ribbon tied around them to attach them to the stone which bears the handprint. I thought it was very kind that someone brought him these items, and I said a prayer for him and for all the victims of the Newtown tragedy as well as the survivors and their families.

 

Under the gazebo sat two ladies talking in gorgeous weather and sharing stories. Some children were playing on the slide and I walked over that way and I was greeted by a little boy who ran and jumped in the air. He landed right next to me and yelled, “Hi!” with the youthful exuberance I once remember that I possessed. I replied back to him, “Hi there buddy. How are you?” He yelled while running toward the slide, “I’m great!!” He started to climb the ladder and I got nervous and his mother rushed over, grabbed his arm, and scolded him for trying such a bold feat.

 

I began to talk with both of his parents who were really nice people, “I have never seen him act like this he never would try something like that” his mother explained. “He is probably just showing off in front of me” I replied and we all laughed. The boy’s father introduced me to the family dog and explained that they are from out of the area and stopped to visit a friend who lives in town on their way to the Shore for the weekend. “This park is great, really nice” the boy’s father said while looking around. “I was here the day they dedicated it. It was really sunny and warm just like today” I explained. “How do you think the recovery is going?” he asked. “Not very well. You have so many people still waiting for money for their homes or they ran out of money trying to pay their mortgage on their unlivable home while paying rent on their current residence for close to three years” I commented.

 

We spoke for a few minutes about Sandy and how many people think that everything is recovered and great down in New Jersey on the Shore. I likened the relief effort to a car that keeps on stalling before it gets into second gear. They liked that analogy. Then the kids were going wild so I let them get back to parenting and I moved on to another part of the park where I bumped into a man on his break from a construction job.

 

Across The Bay

 

He noticed I was wearing a New York Knicks shirt and he immediately said “I am sorry” and we both chuckled (the Knicks had the worst record in the league last season) and he said “If it makes you feel any better I am a Mets fan so I know heartache” and we both started laughing again. He told me that he was working on the rebuilding of a property across the street from the park. “Progress is slow but this town got hit hard” he remarked. “I know I was here the day after Sandy came through and I was totally shocked at the level of destruction. It was like a nuclear bomb got dropped here” I explained.

 

We talked about the slow recovery or stalled recovery of homeowners here and in the area. Then he had to get back to work. I remained and listened to the calm rush of the water against the shore line. There is something so soothing to that sound. I watched the boats out in the Bay and listened as the birds chirped in the trees behind me. I walked past a property where building materials were tied up and unused seemingly for months, and the lot where the home was torn down had pilings of cement put in to elevate a house, yet nothing was there. I remember this lot was in the same condition five or six months ago when I was there. The reality that it will most likely remain in that condition haunted me. This was a home for a family that is now somewhere else, another reminder of the true toll Sandy took on my beloved Jersey Shore.

 

The homes on either side of that lot were in similar disrepair or in stages of unfinished construction. One house where the siding was half finished on the sides and the owner obviously ran out of money, had plywood sealing off the back of the lower level with graffiti spray painted on it. One message read: Smile You’re on camera referring to the news coverage of the destruction.

 

I mentioned earlier that my trips to Union Beach, if nothing else, yield two things: perspective on my own “problems” and interactions with really kind people. I experienced both again today at a time when I was sorely in need of it to remedy my soul. I watched the white puffy clouds move across the sky and looked out across the Bay to the Manhattan skyline where I could see the Freedom Tower, or as they call it now, One World Trade Center. It was towering above the other buildings like a giant looming over midgets.

 

I always think when I look at this grand new building about the former World Trade Center and the 9/11 terror attacks. I reflected again as I stood there in the afternoon sun now so many years later, and felt very small, but at the same time very lucky to have the blessing of a brand new day of life. The park behind me was dedicated to a boy who was killed at 6 years old by a very sick young man in a horrific tragedy. He and others that day never got the chance at life that I have received.

 

I looked back across the Bay and remembered those who tragically lost their lives on 9/11 and so many of those victims were young people in the prime of their lives and careers. So many of them were firefighters, police, and brave first responders who continued to climb up as others fled down and out of the buildings.

 

I returned to the same fact: I am still here and I am blessed to have the chance at life that so many others did not receive. I am surrounded by homes destroyed by a horrible storm which I also lived through and survived. I am here, we are all here for a unique purpose. It is these days and times in Union Beach where I gain the perspective to keep pushing forward down the road of life to find the answers and to determine God’s plan for my life. I hope that this article inspires you to do the same.

 

(Frank J. Maduri is a freelance writer and journalist who has numerous publishing credits for magazines, websites, and major news sources. He has covered Hurricane Sandy, the recovery effort, and social justice issues for years. He continues to use his talents to raise awareness of issues and is searching for God’s plan for his life.)

 

 

Choosing Love: The Story of Jesse Lewis

On the morning of December 14, 2012 the parents and children of Newtown, Connecticut went through their usual routines. Jesse Lewis was picked up by his father, they went to a local deli to get his favorite breakfast sandwich: sausage, eggs, and cheese and a hot chocolate. However, before he got in the car with his father he left a message on his mother’s car. It was a cold morning, and in the frost on the car window he drew with his finger and wrote “I love you” (www.courant.com).

 

Jesse’s mother, Scarlett Lewis, was planning to go to the school later that day to help out in her other child’s class, where they were going to make gingerbread houses. She took a picture of Jesse that morning smiling next to his artwork on her car window (www.dailymail.co.uk).  She did not realize that morning that her son would never come home again.

 

This is the incredible story of Jesse Lewis, a 6 year old boy from Newtown, it is a story of courage, sorrow, pain, loss, hope, reconciliation, kindness, mercy, nurturing, and love. It is a story that I am honored to help tell in my own way, with dignity and respect, in a manner that will honor his memory.

 

Full of life

 

The family friends of Jesse Lewis describe him as being full of life, adventurous, and happy. His favorite toy was the soldier, and he was known to wear an Army helmet, ripped jeans, and boots to romp around in the fields of his rural Connecticut surroundings (www.newyork.cbslocal.com).

 

I remember doing the same thing back when I was Jesse’s age, I would “play Army” with my friends in the woods near our respective homes. Jesse was a typical boy, who liked to run around and get dirty.

 

Other family friends describe Jesse as someone that would leave a mark on your heart once you met him (www.newyork.cbslocal.com). It is those types of statements that compel sadness and this extremely deep hurt caused by the tragic events at Newtown, now one year ago. The loss is just so hard to comprehend because most of the victims were children, innocent children.

 

Bravery in action

 

On December 14, 2012 at approximately 9:30 AM, Adam Lanza fired several rounds from an automatic weapon in order to blast a hole in the entrance door to the Sandy Hook Elementary School (www.cnn.com).

 

Lanza opened fire in the first classroom he entered killing the teacher and 14 children. He then entered Jesse Lewis’s classroom which was led by 27 year old teacher, Ms. Victoria Soto.

 

The Hartford Courant was the first to report Jesse’s actions and put together a timeline based on information provided by the Connecticut State Police and other eyewitnesses. Ms. Soto had the children hiding in a closet in the back of the classroom, the gunman shot and killed her. He opened fire in the classroom killing six children, and when his clip of ammunition had run out, Jesse ran out of his hiding spot and yelled “Run!” to his classmates.

 

The other children ran past Adam Lanza to safety, in all 11 children from Jesse’s class survived, and at least six escaped based on Jesse’s actions. The gunman loaded another clip, and fired a shot into Jesse Lewis’s head killing him instantly (www.courant.com).

 

In the months following the tragedy, stories of many heroes emerged on that horrible day, but the story of Jesse Lewis struck a chord with me.  Here was a 6 year old child, who had just witnessed his teacher get killed, and he stepped out into danger to help his friends. I cannot comprehend such bravery in a dangerous situation from a child. Jesse had the courage to face the gunman and the awareness to know that he had a window of time to save others, what a completely selfless act.

 

In a variety of media reports, his parents have discussed that in the days since the event they are proud that their son died in the way that he lived: fearless and brave. They have discussed their healing process from losing their son, which I cannot comprehend how difficult that must be for them.

 

Nurturing, healing, love

 

Scarlett Lewis decided to start a foundation in honor of the memory of her son, Jesse, and the inspiration behind the foundation was from a message that Jesse had left on the kitchen chalkboard (www.courant.com).

 

Jesse had written these words: “nurturing, healing, and love”. The Jesse Lewis Choose Love Foundation encourages communities to do just that:  “choose love over anger, gratitude over entitlement, and forgiveness and compassion over bitterness” (www.jesselewischooselove.org).

 

 

The foundation develops school-based programs to enable educators to change the culture of aggression and violence into one of calm and peace. To learn more about the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Foundation, or to make a donation please visit their website: www.jesselewischooselove.org for further details.

 

Jesse Lewis was described in his obituary as a boy with “an infectious and radiant smile”, and as someone who was “smart and compassionate beyond his years”. I would certainly agree based on his actions during that terrible day last year. I do not have the expertise to comment on the state of mind of the gunman, Adam Lanza, I do not have any comprehension of how he could have carried out this horrible, senseless act before taking his own life at the Sandy Hook Elementary School. I do not think we will ever know the real reason why he choose to carry out this violent act, let alone involve innocent educators and children.

 

Reflecting back

 

The people of Newtown have requested that the media leave the town alone on Saturday so that they can mourn and grieve those lost in a private manner. The families of the victims have asked that Americans consider doing an act of kindness that day in remembrance of their loved ones who were lost.

 

Before I close with some reflective thoughts, I would like to share with you some poetry I wrote on that tragic and emotional day, and in the days since:

 

“The Low Sun Over the Trees”

My wife said with a sad voice;

“I thought we would never see another Columbine”

I wish I had the power to make the choice.

A day, normal, unsuspecting, with sunshine;

I had appointments, errands to run

Then the news, a school shooting occurred;

A tragic event which would stun –

Myself and everyone. Everything blurred –

By the tears I wept for those lost;

In a Connecticut elementary school today.

The lives that are twisted and tossed

Upside down – there is no explanation, no way

To understand the evil that caused it

As I spoke to my wife late in the afternoon

The information is coming in bit by bit.

Christmas will come to us soon

To lift the spirits of some

Those children will never forget.

No matter how many years are to come;

There are some things time will not let.

I hope that God hears my pleas

As I watch the low Sun over the trees.

 

 

“27”

 

Twenty seven are dead today

By the gun of a sick young man

I asked my sisters to pray –

With me to understand God’s plan.

A Connecticut school filled with children

Filled at one time with laughter, joy

You just never know where or when

This one day, one act, it would destroy.

Through the hallways bullets were flying

Images, things no child should see

Children, huddled, screaming and crying

In the end twenty seven are dead

Many of them between the ages of 5 and 10

I can’t think of it, the sense of dread

You never know what will happen

In this crazy, fallen world today

Moving forward will be a difficult road

Some may never find their way

Others will block out the whole episode

Twenty seven are dead today

By the gun of a sick young man

We all have to stop and pray

In order to understand God’s plan

 

“Will It End?”

 

Will it end – this tragedy, this pain?

Just when I think it will –

Something happens, so horrible, so shrill

I listen to others dealing with pain

 

Will it end? Children killed in school

By a deranged man for no reason

Right in the middle of the holiday season

Will it end? A husband drowns his wife in a pool

 

Will it end? This disrespect for life

Will the next generation bring change?

The next wave of criminals is born

A world filled with chaos and strife

Will it end? Will it rearrange?

Will societal morals continue to be torn?

 

 

“The Root”

 

Trees grow strong and tall;

An example of beauty of scale.

Humans in love some of us fall

Then we feel we cannot fail

The root of it all is love

It’s the greatest gift –

Endowed from our Creator above

Without it – you’ll feel a rift

My life, through love, has been enriched

The love of family, the love of my wife

Others have lost it, or been ditched

Love has been the root, the stability in my life,

Faith, hope and love there to help when we fall

The greatest of these is love, love above all.

 

 

Scarlett Lewis has spoken with the media in the past about living by The Golden Rule. My father used to say it all the time when I was younger, and in fact, we spoke about it just the other day. My father would say, “If people lived by The Golden Rule, this world we be a better place”, if people would love one another it really would be a better world.

This article was being finished when I learned of another school shooting in Colorado down the road from Columbine High School. The reports are that two students are injured and the gunman is dead (www.usatoday.com). This senseless violence has to stop.

 

We will all have distinct memories in the next few days regarding the Newtown school shooting, and the depths of pain we felt for those lost that day will return. The parents of the children who were so horribly killed that day ask us to move forward from this disaster by being kind to each other, to forgive those who have hurt us in some way in our lives.

We all have pain and suffering in our lives, each in various forms and degrees. We all get angry or frustrated at points as well. We all have days where we may feel tired and lonely or afraid. We have to remember the courage that a boy like Jesse Lewis showed that day, to have the strength to face our own fears.

 

 

 

We have to remember when we feel anger, to do what Scarlett Lewis would ask us to do: choose love. It will honor the memory of those children to choose love and forgiveness in those situations, to live by The Golden Rule:  to love your neighbor as yourself.  If we all did that, our society would be better, our world would be a better place for us and the generations of children to follow.